Frustrated

I have been meaning to post for awhile, but I haven't been able to bring myself to actually do it. Every time I think about it I get so frustrated. Things were going great (considering the circumstances). Dr. Reading was great she was coordinating with Dr. Ferguson for a surgery date. I was happy with my Doctors and we found out surgery was scheduled for May 6. I liked that, I was ready to get things done. I found out on Monday the 21st of April about surgery, we also got some insurance papers in the mail. Turns out UPS updated their contracts and switched insurance providers. We knew the contract was coming up so when we found out about the cancer in March Ryan tried calling to see what was going on, he told them about the cancer and tried to explain that we didn't want to be in the middle of everything and find out our insurance had switched. Basically he got the run around and no one could give him any answers, Until April 21 when we found out that as of April 1st our insurance had switched! Instead of IHC being a provider the U of U was the big provider, IHC is not even contracted, which is where ALL my doctors are! I as so upset. The stupid third party insurance ladies we get to talk to are rude and not helpful at all. Basically they can recite what the insurance book says, which I already read. They told me I "could go anywhere I wanted" DUH. Of course I can go anywhere I want, it doesn't mean they will pay for it! I don't think she understands how insurance works. "We will pay 100% of reasonable and customary" She told me, which doesn't help because I would be responsible for the difference! I can't even imagine what the difference would be on that surgery and reconstruction! I wanted to reach through the phone and punch her in the face! I also hoped all the houses of the high ups and UPS would burn! I am so happy their wallets are getting bigger because they can screw their employees by getting a ghetto insurance plan and letting them know about it in the middle of the month!! You can probably tell I am still a little upset about it. It is not that I can't go see good doctors still. We can now go to the Huntsman Cancer Institute, which is good. But it is so frustrating when you have been referred to good doctors, feel comfortable with them and have surgery scheduled in 2 weeks. Now I have an appointment with a plastic surgeon at Huntsman on the day I was supposed to be having surgery, and I can't even get in to see the surgeon until the 14th of May, which means surgery won't be until the end of May (earliest) to beginning of June! We are staring over. I am sorry this is a depressing post.I just can't even tell you how upset, mad, and defeated I have felt. I have been trying to have a positive attitude about this, not easy, people tell me what a good attitude I have, and I feel like I am lying to everyone! I am feeling a little better. I know Huntsman will be a good place to be, I am nervous about meeting new doctors and waiting another month for surgery. Waiting weighs on you, it consumes your thoughts, it steals my days off, it adds tension. My sisters wedding is the end of June. I want to throw her a bridal shower, but when? What if I schedule it and then end up having surgery? If I wait I will still be recovering. I was hoping to feel pretty good at her wedding, I don't want to have drains coming out my sides! I know it is a silly thing to worry about but I do. She is my only sister and I want to be able to do all the things a sister should do. I know she won't be mad and I know she understands, but I don't know if I do. So thats the latest drama in my life. Technically nothing is really happening. Just waiting. Sorry this is such a depressing post. Maybe I will post a happy story next time. Thank you all again for your love and support, you really do make a difference and help me get through the rough days!